Role of A Mentor

Many people think that their purpose is to help others. But in fact, one cannot help others before they are ready, so in a way they need to “help themselves” first. And helping oneself, become ready to help others, is a journey.

It is a very long journey if walked alone.

One needs a mentor, and teacher and trusted advisor to get wherever they are going fast.

About 20+ years ago I began to appreciate self knowledge and awareness, developing inme from sources I chose as my intellectual mentors. I wanted to know, and not only know the answers, but to know how to ask the questions that bring answers that give me tools to do what I want.

I seek not to know the answers, but to understand the questions. (IMDB quotes “Kung Fu” Caine)

So I began to look for a mentor. The role of a mentor is not one of a teacher. A mentor can teach but that’s not all the mentor does.

I know, you don’t so listen! J.Riggio, PhD.

A mentor is not a friend either. Although choosing a mentor who is friendly is a must:) A mentor is not a therapist, but a skillful experienced mentor incorporates skills that sometimes create transformation in a mentee. A variety of skills for a mentor is a must. The role of a mentor is not to heal you, or therapize you, but to lead you to the way of being the way you are when you are able to make decisions on your own.

A mentor is a trusted advisor, a person who can hold the space for you keeping your higher intention in mind, every time you are with them, to show you to model what you are when you got it, until you can do it on your own. A mentor has walked the path you aspire to walk, a journey you are on, they’ve been through already. A mentor is a model, in some respect for you to follow, to model after, a trusted counselor, a guide.

I have been following the natural pull to learn about the magic of human mind, body and my own inspiration. While doing my research, learning, studying, attending seminars, and generally directing my life to creating a base of knowledge and experience, I came upon some people, who became my intellectual mentors. It is them I appreciate here, as I enriched myself with practical and theoretical basis, so I can operate freely and creatively utilizing this base when working with my clients.

“Once the mind is expanded it is impossible for it to retract to its original state.”

Here I just want to share a condensed list of those who opened the doors to magic of life for me, where there were only walls before, my intellectual mentors, people who I admire, learned from or followed. Studies with these people influenced the way I process my story, what I believe, the way I live my life. Each day, without changing “who I am” I enhance my “self”, my own level of satisfaction, and the way I help others uncover, appreciate and sustain “who they are”.

I love to read. I must admit that my unsatiated reading habit started with my mother, reading to me various book out loud since… probably very early age. She taught me to read and gave me books that inspired my interest. As I am told, since age 2, I was often found sitting on the floor in our old living room and out loud imitating my mother reading to me from a book that was often… upside down. I imagine it was a hilarious scene.

Lewis Caroll’s Alice in Wonderland Alice in Wonderland was of course in the list of my favorite books, despite its ugly illustrations in the edition that was available to me.

Alice: What is the use of a book, without pictures or conversations? (Quotes).

I always found metaphors in this book were a little more eye opening than it was intended for a  kid…

Books inspired my imagination. I imagined myself a clever philosopher, not unlike Alice, when I immersed myself inside each consequtive book, which was always “the best book I ever read”…. When I came to New York and as a gift I got a copy of Alice… with editor’s notes, I was beside myself with happiness as that book became the inspiration to my personal story.

Dr. Seuss – After I retired from Wall Street and opened my new holistic business. Moving apartments in 2001, I came upon the forgotten collection of Dr. Seuss. Suddenly revisiting Green Eggs and Ham and Cat in A Hat made sense for me. It wasn’t just rhyming, it wasn’t just a story, it was a collage of words, that made a picture, talking to my core, where words were sounds, colors and vibrations.

Tony Robbins – The first book by Tony Robbins Unlimited Power…, which I read in 1989 and was truly shocked by the thinking that was not allowed or available to me in the “old” country.

A real decision is measured by the fact that you’ve taken a new action. If there’s no action, you haven’t truly decided. (Tony Robbins Quotes)

Shakti Gawain –  Creative Visualization was always “my” thing,  so when I read her book Creative Visualization, and I thought that was “it”! My journey took yet a new turn here. I began mapping and creating, drawing, painting the future of bright and inspired colors. Years later, this creative way of expressing my spirituality lead me to traveling to Sedona, Egypt, Tibet, to find more meaning to my path, “past lives” metaphors, and activate my “kundalini” vortex of energy.

Andrew Wiehl –  About the same time Andrew Weihl’s breathing techniques and meditative work became my guide to a starting my own regular meditative practice.

Richard Bandler, John Grinder, Robert Dilts – I learned NLP, eye access, and other techniques from reading and watching the “crazy guy” make it all simple and doable for me. I found inner power when I began to understand the meaning of “words are important”, and their books Structure of Magic (Bandler&Grinder), Beliefs (Dilts), etc.

Tom Kenyon, Jonathan Goldman – The beautiful tones and sound vibrations of outer dimentional beings – Hathors, built esthetically coherent energy of harmonious music tones.

Moshe Feldenkrais, Dr. Stone, Iyengar – In relation to body connection with mind, the importance of posture, physical fitness and ability to alleviate imaginary dangers, stress came to forefront. Iyengar yoga practice became my favorite body building technique and helped me move down 3 sizes in dress and up in my confidence.

Dr. Stone’s Polarity theory was shockingly genius.  Our body is an electrical polarized machine, which is self-seeking to be in balance. Once polarity is balanced, we find peace in mind! Feldenkrais, Alexander techniques reveal how physical wellness and posture affect movement and mood, and brought my awareness to my own posture. It took me almost 2 years to bring up the strength to my core so I am more comfortable sitting upright than slouching.

Milton Erickson – A brilliant hypnotist, a doctor, and an inventor of a breakthrough method of applied metaphor to healing hypnotic protocols for fast, often immediate transformation. Learning from the best master in the world was my privilege and inspiration. Ericksonian approach was fascinating, and the title of the book by his apprentice Ernest Rossi,  My Voice Will Go With You...Wherever You Are.. became my motto, as I became a hypnotist. As I learned about possibilities of applications of hypnosis that are really transformational, I was inspired to find my specialization in metaphor hypnosis.

Joseph Campbell’s  Hero’s Journey became my inspiration to exploring the exciting adventure of my life from various angles finding fascinating mythological references and co-relations. Transpersonal mythology became the focus of my study and creative work with clients.

Brain Weiss PhD, Michael Newton PhD – Then I came upon the metaphor based transpersonal hypnosis, a metaphor of past lives, parallel lives, life between lives. The higher consciousness hypnosis lead me to discovery of my own awe state of connection, which upon research lead me to discovering Gamma state hypnosis for information and inspiration. I began to utilize the technique of deriving the information for my clients through showing them their own state of gamma hypnosis information, employing interactive technique of hypnotic conversation in gamma awareness.

Joseph Chilton Pearce’s books present awareness in a cosmologically universal sense. His book Miracle Child shows the research of presence of consciousness and awareness in a child even before birth. Teaching parents-to-be preparing for their baby’s arrival the techniques of HypnoBirthing (utilizing hypnosis for peaceful birthing process) gives a whole new meaning to the word “awareness” in the sense of legacy parents pass onto their child.

Avatar, as in the movie by James Cameron, 2009. Avatar is not a new concept, but it is a great metaphor, in my opinion. I love the idea of creating a representation of yourself in the future, in the way you want to be, perhaps even imagine yourself and your avatar have a conversation, about how they made it possible, so you can learn how you can make it possible for yourself, and then playing for yourself the life of that avatar, making up a complete new story, with changes along the way. What an easy way to change your life!

Joseph Riggio  I saved this one for last. My mentor for the last 7  years is Dr. Joseph Riggio. I was introduced to Joseph by my partner Mark who also already studied with him for years.

When people ask me how many years I studied to be that good that I am in what I do, I answer, for the last 7 years and for the 4o years that preceded those 7. Every mentor has a mentor, so does Joseph…

What’s valuable in this learning is that what in the last 30 years, Joseph presented a series of ideas, one evolving from the next, that are deeply rooted in mythology, behavior studies, societal studies, use of language, personal power, scientific studied of the brain – neuro-biology, world mythology, Zen and Dao theories, and on and on… and based on technologies like NLP, hypnotism, Feldenkrais, yoga,  and many more. What emerges is a breakthrough thought in every way captivating attention and directing personal energy.

Dr. Riggio’s teaching in advanced semantics is highly impactful for me, relevant to my interest in personal mythology and effectiveness with the client, and in developing my creativity and a new angle for my own mythology, so I can be free to help others in the most effective way.

I value mentoring, it is of absolute value, short-term and long-term, so my aspiration is to continue and enhance the value for my clients, so as I evolve, they have the opportunity to evolve. As I am free, so you are also free to make choices and decision that you truly want for yourself.

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"As a mentor, you probably heard it before, but I will say it again. Now, after I started working with you, it is easier for me to do what I have to do at work. I manage a number of people and tasks, this coordination used to be tedious for me, and I used to get angry and impatient. Now I have a totally different awareness, and I had great experience learning through Gamma Hypnosis." Tim Daniel, 48, Sr. Manager, New York

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